Chapter 353: Chapter LXXVI: The Quarrelsome Quintet
Chapter 353: Chapter LXXVI: The Quarrelsome Quintet
"NYEH HEH HEH HEH!" The oddly pitched noise coming from the higher lich makes me blink in surprise 'I mean I knew calling someone a thing for a while would make them
subconsciously lean towards it but good damn that is uncanny.'
'Mind fuckery?' Scorch posits, suddenly making me tense.
But I relax just as swiftly 'Highly unlikely, he'd consider it a waste of time and I doubt he can mindfuck with the best of them.'
The bird himself narrows his currently proverbial eyes but says nothing, his mind leaving our link as he returned his focus to Windhelm.
The floating undead suddenly stops himself, the shift making him forget to keep his levitation spell going as his bare bones clacked against the stone floor. Though he was not all that focused on this as he imitated clearing his throat "You heard nothing."
The pointed and amused stares directed at him told him exactly just how much that was going to work for him, namely not at all.
"I am never living that down am I?" He grumbles to himself but the echoey walls of the chamber ensure that he is heard by all.
"No, I am quite afraid not." Tolfdir chuckles.
Phineas pauses, staring at him for a moment, and then shrugs "Eh, worth it."
Shalazar giggles at that "Indeed! Slay not the shame but the part that feels shamed!"
"Is that... wise?" Master Sergius sounds quite worried.
"Don't listen to him Sergius." Savos places a hand on his shoulder "That way lies madness." He whispers with a conspiratorial wink.
"Insane bloody old coots." Skeletor incarnate keeps on grumbling "Testing please!" He snaps his fingers and we all get back to work, going through a grueling pre-planned series of tests to ensure no unfortunate errors would come back to bite him in the ass decades later.
Oh how he whined when I told him he had to summon his soul jar back just in case. A very understandable feeling no doubt, but if he wanted me to check the results over he would just have to trust me or leave himself under potential risk.
He was intelligent enough not to insult all the archmagi present by being overparanoid. While I was looking over said phylactery, the invisibility spell weaved above it doing very little to truly hide the magical torrent from my senses, I noticed a rater unfortunate little addition "Told you you shouldn't have used Mannimarco as one of the focal points." I mumble with a fair bit of annoyance in my tone.
Phineas stills, the others also looking at me with some concern "It is nothing too problematic from what I can feel" I explain "The god of necromancy just... marked his property? I think that would be the best way of describing it. He may exert some influence and draw a minuscule amount of power from you but that should be as far as things go."
The lich remains unmoving for a while yet, before his newly engorged skull slowly twists in my direction "And if I did not want him to get anything?" He asks very calmly, though I can practically taste his revulsion even with his lack of visible expression.
Those eye flames were surprisingly vivid.
"Then I'd say you should have worried about that earlier because your 'petition' was heard and approved." I tell him with a relaxed grin "Or at least that is what I would do if I was a little bitch and not the only person alive capable of cutting off the influence of gods on a whim."
"Gods fucking damn it Dagoth." He palms his boney face "What do you want?"
"I am sorry Phineas, I am not quite sure I caught that?" My grin widens to shiteating proportions.
Only to disappear as I wince to a sudden whack on the ear from a particularly scaly hand "Motherfucker those are sensitive!" I hiss and step away from the Great Lizard Wizard.
The Honored One squints at me, his most magnificent crimson eyeballs radiating supreme power "Now, now, student mine, we are dealing with what you so often like to call 'soul fuckery' here. Best be rid of such unfortunate issues before something decides to worm its way in while you are having your fun."
The moment he mentioned worms, as in the King of Worms AKA Mannimarco, Blasphemy was in my hand "Phylactery, now!"
Much to his credit, Phineas hesitated for only a reasonable twenty seconds before finally, after a whole load of prodding, he proffered the soul jar, still holding it in his hands as was appropriately paranoid.
I made sure my movements were slow and visible as I tapped the supposedly indestructible yet oh so fragile object with the side of my sword, the whole room lurching under the sudden force of the magic in the air as my fiery grey aura manifested on instinct, an ancient pair of eyes staring at me for the briefest moments before deciding that caution was the greater part of valor here and promptly fucking off.
Manny was a worm through and through, and he could recognize a losing battle and a waste of resources when he saw one.
The moment I pulled my sword back Phineas hugged the ornate bottle like his life depended on it, which it very much so did, and when he spoke he sounded almost skittish "Is it... is it done?" Had he flesh he would have been shivering.
My eyes glowed as I made one final observation and I nodded "Should be fine now, just make sure not to visit any cults anytime soon. Ole' Manny is probably going to be pissed at us for a few centuries at least."
"Piss on him then." Phineas' skull twists into a rather terrifying grin "No one gets to fuck with my soul like he tried to."
"Uh huh." I give him a deadpan stare.
He has the decency to look away at least "Yeah, yeah. Thanks for your help you bloody insult
to nature."
Damn, he really knows how to give compliments "Always a pleasure to insult the cunts amongst the divine." I grin "Now, about that help I aske for?"
"Hold student!" Shalazar interrupts us "There is tradition to observe!"
"What tradi- oh." I stop myself "Do I have time for it?"
His lizardly face twists into what I can easily intuit is a question of the firmity of my intellect, the question of 'Do you really think I'd risk that much just to fool around?' rather clear even with nothing being voiced.
"Right." I nod and clap my hands "Why don't you go back to your chambers and prepare, eh Phineas? I will meet you when you are ready."
He hesitates for a moment before slowly nodding "Fine. Need to check on my idiot apprentice anyway." And then floats away to the exit.
I make some small talk with Turanius, mostly about life and the dangers the dragons presented before we inevitably veered towards our shared art. I made sure to throw in a bunch of tips I discovered and even added some of Gauldur's insights as I did, hopefully this would help him advance at least a little bit, he may not be an innovator but he was still the man who taught me my primary field of magic and opened a literal whole new world for me.
He noticed us anticipating something and realizing that he was not privy to it for a reason he soon excused himself from the chamber, giving me one last cheerful wave as he left.
"It should be about time." Tolfdir voices after a minute.
"Come hither colleagues mine!" Shalazar waves us forth "We must away! Swiftly!"
With both amusement and a slight bit of terror I approach the diminutive Argonian along the remaining duo and in a quiet snap we all disappear from the hall and reappear in a familiar chamber filled to the brim with massive tomes and anatomical research material.
Just in time for the doors to open and for Phineas to step in "What the fu-" He stops himself "Found something else I should worry about?" He asks cautiously.
"I have been remiss." Tolfdir speaks up patiently as he walks to the side of the group "For in
my excitement I have forgotten to grant recognition earned."
"What are you on about you old fart?" Phineas narrows his once more illusory eyes.
"The ritual performed, even with aid, is more than worthy of being called a grand act of alteration." Tolfdir continues, uncaring for Phineas' usual crassness "So it is with my great pleasure that I declare your advanced studies in my chosen field to be complete, Master
Phineas."
The grouchy lich blinks "Oh" and only his lack of flesh stops him from blushing like a maiden "I umm..." He scratches the back of his skull "Thanks?"
"One need offer no gratitude for something righteously earned!" Shalazar squeaks proudly "But you must wonder even now why we all have gathered, no?"
"I am sure you were about to inform me whatever my answer." The lich deadpans. "Your wisdom remains aflame, oh most calcified of female genitals!" The Lizard Wizard
throws his tiny hands up in jubilation and ignoring the "The fuck did you just call me?" He went on "And that same flame is why we have gathered, to welcome another to our little group of the insightful and of the enlightened!"
I pretend to sigh "The tenure of the Fearsome Foursome was indeed short, but time must move on." I 'lament' "A worthy sacrifice for the addition to our little company no doubt." Savos chuckles "A terrible fate I am sure." He shakes his head before clearing his throat lightly "Shalazar's bad naming sense and Reyvin's pouting aside." The Argonian squeaks in indignation and I flip him off "It is my greatest honor to be able to do this once again" He flicks his hand and an ornate cup appears within his hand "And welcome Winterhold's fifth
Archmage into the fold!"
Phineas stared at us for a good while before simply stating "Neat."
"Neat?" Tolfdir raises an eyebrow "I had thought the invitation would elicit more of a
reaction."
"You lot are not nearly as subtle as you believe yourselves to be." Phineas points out, though
it is obvious he is keeping himself from squealing like a little girl and rolling on the floor due to the recognition of the same people who were no doubt once his goals and idols "You basically revealed everything." He pauses "Oblivion, you even added me to the literal 'Inner Circle' on the orb!"
"I like to think of it as a sign of our faith in your success." Savos grins.
He almost stumbles at that but manages to keep his footing. Though my highly amused look informs him of just how convincing the act was.
"Bah." He waves his hand "Not like I was ever going to refuse anyway." A distant latch
unlocks and a bottle levitates to the four of us while he grabs onto a peculiar alchemical concoction held in a vial.
"Cheers you insane fuckers." He raises the vial and downs it, the viscous liquid somehow sticking to his mouth and apparently letting him taste the drink.
The highly expensive, and incredibly aged, wine he offered us was pretty good as well. Far better than I had in my own stock... not that I would ever admit that of course.
As Phineas was currently stuck conversing with Shalazar and Tolfdir, I felt my grandfather
approaching me from my right.
"Long day?" He asks.
"Try a long year." I grumble "I've been chasing every crumb of power I could get my hands on recently and it was wisely pointed out to me that that is not a healthy way to live. And so here I
sit, brooding."
"Sometimes I forget you are still a child." He chuckles before raising his hands placatingly "Relatively a child." He corrects carefully "I'd love to give you some sage advice that would
magically fix all of your problems but none of those end up with you remaining involved with defending the world I am afraid."
"Unsurprising." I shrug "It isn't like I am terribly shaken by it, merely contemplative."
"Just make sure not to contemplate too much, yeah?" He grins and taps my shoulder
supportively "You sure you don't want me over there? I can more than afford to help."
"Something tells me." I begin after a while "That weakening the defenses overmuch would
be... unwise."
"A prophecy or a premonition?" Savos asks, suddenly a lot more serious. "Premonition mostly." I nod "Just follow Shalazar's reactions today and you will
understand."
"Yes..." Savos mutters, mildly irritated "Had he felt my presence unneeded here he would
have corrected you."
The Lizard Wizard suddenly stops talking and winks at us before continuing his sentence as if
he had never stopped.
"I am still not sure if that man is cute or unnerving." I mutter.
"Both?" Savos asks.
"Both." I nod.
"So, my dearest junior archmage." I begin as I sit next to Phineas, the rest of the 'old coots'
having left a minute or so prior.
He twitches quite violently at the address.
"Ready to move out yet?" I ask "Or do you need to grab some corpses?"
He looks like he wants to retort but shakes his head "No. The Falmer I have in storage should
serve to start with."
"Ah, want to make another ghoul wave?" I ask, intrigued.
He rolls his illusory eyes "What I want to do is have the option."
"Of course." I nod easily "Just trying to take the whole battlefield into account."
"Maybe you should stop getting ahead of yourself and wait until you reach the bloody
battlefield then." He grouses "Anyway, I am off to see to my apprentice and then we can fuck off to the army."
"How is he doing by the way?" I ask, my voice still holding a fair bit of disappointment towards Marwyn.
"Almost fully cleansed himself." The lich says, and that was all he needed to do "He should
go through the ritual suicide in a month at the longest."
I shake my head "Bloody fool." And wave for him to go "Get him ready then, we've dallied
enough."
It takes him a good half hour to dote on his mini me but he returns quickly enough to notn/o/vel/b//in dot c//om
irritate me overmuch and with a snap of my finger I focus on the orb currently making distance from Windhelm and space cracks under my will. Now then, how to introduce a necromancer to an army of Nords?
We were this close to the sensational sextet but there just wasn't enough stone to go around...
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